La cedilla

lunes, 21 de abril de 2008


Me estreno como editor de este blog; espero estar a la altura y ser un digno proveedor de manías y fobias con las que satisfacer sus psiques. Seguramente ustedes y yo coincidiremos en muchos odios, así que se sentirán identificados con alguna de mis entradas. Sin duda, eso les hará sentir menos especiales.

Mi primer odio manifiesto lo quiero proclamar contra el símbolo que antaño se usó para el fonema predorsodentoalveolar africado sordo, es decir, la cedilla, ç. Y no lo odio porque introduzca complejidad al escribir, ya que hoy por hoy sólo necesito encontrarlo en el teclado cuando escribo "Visca el Barça", "curaçao" o "garçon", es decir, jamás; lo odio por todas las veces que lo encuentro sin buscarlo.

Imaginen una conversación sofisticada y glamourosa, imaginen ese tipo de charla en la que ustedes se están sintiendo inteligentes. O tal vez imaginen que de sus mentes sale una frase de refinado humor, o un brillante adagio, o una contestación ácida al más puro estilo Ignatius Reilly, tienen en ese momento la frase perfecta. O tal vez están seduciendo a otra persona y viene a su mente la frase definitiva que inclinará la balanza. Oh vamos, traten de visualizarlo, no puede ser tan difícil.

Pues bien, se están ustedes comunicando en un chat, o en mensajería instantánea. La frase sale de sus sinapsis neuronales, baja por el cuello, se divide en el esternón, y la mitad viaja hacia la mano derecha, la otra mitad hacia la izquierda, y ustedes la teclean. Y en el momento culminante de pulsar el "intro" que lanza la frase hacia su destino, sucede. Al final de la mejor frase de sus vidas, hay una cedilla díscola que se ha colado por su simple cercanía con el botón de enviar.

Mírenla ahí, sacando su pequeña y ondulada lengua. Rompiendo el encanto, distrayendo la atención hacia la forma y quitándole su importancia al fondo. Reclamando su protagonismo. ¡Demonios! Maldita cedilla, eres una protegida, tienes la notoriedad que tienes sólo porque alguien te quiso poner al lado del "Intro". Alguien te hizo la tecla favorita para pulsar sin querer.

Por último me gustaría proponer las siguientes frases, para que contemplen el anticlímax:

VitoCorleone> Le haré una oferta que no podrá rechazarç

RedButler> Francamente, querida, me importa un bledoç

JackDawson> Todo hombre que se precie crea su propia suerteç

AlbertEinstein> Dios no juega a los dados con el Universoç



Lo detestó Ale a las 12:52 p. m.  

159 detestaron:

Mucho tiempo pensé como vos.
Encontrar ese antiestético firulete al final de una frase te hace sentir menos. Te hace desear, por un segundo o dos, no haber nacido en esta época.
Mi teclado actual, además de borroso y lleno de migas, no tiene la bendita tecla.
¿Feliz?
Bueno, no. Es notoria la ausencia de ese caracter cortapolvos (si me permiten la expresión) en la mensajería instantanea. ¿Pero que pasa cuando uno tiene que escribir "garçon"? (si está acá escrita es por la dupla Ctrl+C / Ctrl+V y no porque la haya escrito). Una persona normal no tendría problemas con reemplazarla por su prima la "c"... pero una mente enferma como la mía falla unos momentos al pensar una alternativa para agregar el dichoso caracter, momentos que como muchos saben, son preciosos en la mensajería instantanea. Uno perdió la oportunidad de usar la frase matadora y listo. El mundo ya no será el mismo.

Pola dijo...
3:33 p. m.  

Oh!! Completamente cierto!!!!

marmotilla dijo...
4:21 p. m.  

Pero pobre cedilla.... es un ejemplo claro de discriminación positiva. A los más débiles hay que protegerles. Seguro que a la "a" no le hace falta nada para poder salir constantemente.

Anónimo dijo...
4:40 p. m.  

Ale, excelente comienzo. Mi teclado no tiene el curioso signo a mano, de manera que no lo incluyo ni por casualidad. Pero ahora que lo menciona me cayó simpático y me dan ganas de esçribirlo a çada rato.

Bugman dijo...
5:00 p. m.  

Mire usted. A mi edad aprendiendo algo nuevo. No sabía que ese extraño símbolo se llamaba "cedilla".
La situación que usted describe equivale al momento culminante en el que uno está diciendo "la frase matadora" de la noche ante una seductora dama y, al pronunciar la última sílaba, un moco se pianta por un orificio nasal quedando adherido al bigote.
Resumiendo y para coincidir con usted: "la cedilla es un moco".

7:05 p. m.  

ç

capitanfla dijo...
12:07 a. m.  

al fin algo nuevo Bugman!

Cara de Silla dijo...
3:23 a. m.  

Jajajaja! Qué bueno XD

Yo sólo la usaría para el emoticono llorica: Ç.Ç

Y es la primera vez que la uso. He tenido la suerte de que nunca se me ha colado. La ñ se suele meter más a menudo en medio de los artículos, por eso de que está junto a la L.

Un saludo.

Victoria dijo...
8:01 a. m.  

@pola. ¡Qué grandísima palabra! ¡firulete!. Muchas gracias por enseñármela. Por otra parte... podría poner un ejemplo de frase que contenga la ç, y que dicha unos segundos más tarde cambie el mundo?. Solo por curiosidad, gracias.
@Marmota. Pásate por aquí más veces para seguir sorprendiéndote!
@Consultor Anónimo. La cedilla no es la más débil en absoluto. Se cuela por la fuerza con total impunidad. Seguro que yo la pulso más veces que a la w o a la x.
@Bugman. ¡No! ¡No lo haga! ¡Evite la tentación! ¡No podrá parar!
@Manhattan Transfer. Hace tanto que no digo una frase matadora ante una dama que seguramente si lo intentase tendría más cedillas que letras...
@Capitanfla. No se puede decir más con menos símbolos.
@Pitty. Errr. No soy Bugman... mire, mire! tengo pelo!
@Victoria. NO estoy muy seguro de que ese emoticono sea llorica. Me parece más bien erótico - festivo, pero bueno, seguro que es cosa mía.
@todos. Muchas gracias por vuestros comentarios positivos :oD

Anónimo dijo...
1:19 p. m.  

Lo de la cedilla te pasa por no tener esos dedacos que tienes!!! A mi por ejemplo, lo de la cedilla al final de una frase nunca me ha pasadoç

Juannillo dijo...
5:12 p. m.  

Suscribo, apoyo y abrazo su fobia contra la insultante intrusión de la cedilla. Me pasa con mucha frecuencia.ç

Garfio dijo...
9:14 p. m.  

"...fonema predorsodentoalveolar africado sordo..."
Tanto lio para decir "cedilla"
Qué tipo complicado!!
ajajajaa

Yo tambien odio esa cedilla. Porque me equivoco mucho cuando escribo, ya que mis dedos no siempre responden al mandato de mi neurona. Entonces le voy a dar a la tecla de la flechita, y como corresponde, me aparece la cedilla que está justo al lado!!!
Esa cedilla es mas metida que mi suegra, con eso le digo todo!!!

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Где-то в середине лета мне мама сказала: "А ты знаешь, К. (брат подруги Н.) женится,мне ее мама сказала, тебе Н. еще не говорила?". Я была удивлена, так как вполне вероятностей заявить эту радостную новость было масса. Учитывая, что про всех наших общих знакомых, коих я видела раза 2, я узнавала от Н. незамедлительно на моменте подачи заявления и первых месяцев беременности. Мама меня подхлестнула, сказав :вот видишь, какая твоя Н. подруга. ..
Я решила терпеливо дожидаться, когда я узнаю об этом...
Сегодня позвонила, хотела взять карточку в Летуаль. На вопрос: что делаешь?, Н. ответила игривым голосом: "А я у брата на свадьбе!". В моем голосе не слышно было веселья, когда я сказала:" А ясно, мои поздравления, не буду отвлекать". Она мне начала говорить, когда у нее выходной, но мне было все точно еще, я знала, потерял свой блеска подругу...
Она меня не предавала. Но я знаю, что молчала она специально. Боялась, что я обижусь, что меня не пригласили? Но с чего бы я обязана обижаться: он мой знакомый неплохой, но не друг. Пригласили бы-пошла, нет-значит нет. Она знает, что я адекватна в этих вопросах. Так отчего она мне ничего не сказала?
У нее я спрашивать не хочу, начнет отмазываться, вообще с ней общаться не хочу.

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